Realize Just How Great You Are

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."
– Mark Twain



On my journey to a healthier (and slimmer) me, this one hits home. I can think of other areas of my life – particularly in my past – where I wish I had listened more to the really great people and less to the really small people. But since finding a healthier me is at the forefront of my mind these days, it really spoke to me.





As a child, I struggled with my weight as well as eating disorders. I grew up in a ‘take-out’ home, so when I became an adult, I found it much easier to go through a drive thru than to teach myself even the basics around the kitchen. I remember quite vividly, being told by my dad that I was going to end up fat just like my mom and sisters, all the while shoveling greasy, fattening foods into his own mouth. Daddy was supposed to love me and uplift me, and instead, belittled me - and our family.



When I started this journey to a healthier me 8 weeks ago, I didn’t really believe I could do it. Oh I wanted to!! I wanted to so bad I could almost, well, taste it. But that ambition seemed so…far out to me. I had to take a step back from my thoughts and fears and remember this quote. I had to think about the uplifting and encouraging words of Boo and our friends. Because those great people are who keep me grounded.



It would be all too easy to listen to Daddy’s voice in the back of my head. Heck, there’s more than Daddy’s voice in there. Bullies, teachers, ‘friends’, trusted adults from my childhood…..so many people that planted so much self-hatred and a very skewed view of myself that I almost didn’t make it to my twenties. When I was just 21, I made the choice to forgive those people; and, to let them go. It wasn’t easy. I had to seriously fight for confidence, pride, and self-love. But I came out on the other side as a warrior. As a survivor.



I feel that our teenagers, and adults even, are in a constant battle against themselves. We have been taught by our mothers, fathers, teachers, friends, and social media that men and women are supposed to look and act a certain way. If you are ‘different’, not matter what the reason, you are not lovable.



Those of us in the LGBTQ community know this all too well. If you are born as a female, society tells you to wear dresses and make up and high heels and to suck in your tummy and boost up your girls!! If you are born male, you should be athletic and macho and only drink beer and heaven forbid you enjoy musicals!! We are taught from a very young age to be this way; to be ladies and gentlemen. But what if we don’t feel normal conforming to societies norm? What then?



We could all share hundreds of stories of how we have been mistreated and belittled for being too femme or too butch or for being trans.



And sadly we could probably all share stories of being told we aren’t beautiful, or think enough, or good enough, or (insert your own hateful word here).



Today, I am thankful. I am thankful for the family and friends that I have surrounded myself with. I am thankful for the strength to let go and forgive those that tried to crush my spirit. I am thankful for the courage I mustered from deep within my soul to do something different for myself and for my wife. And I am thankful to be able to share, and to encourage you to do the same.



Who or what do you need to step back from? Maybe they, too, are in your past. Or maybe they sleep next to you every night. Take a moment and realize just how great you are!



And please, feel free to share in your comments your own experiences in letting go the small people, or maybe who or what you need to let go of…